Step One: Swearing Off Girls

In an attempt to regain my moral footing when it comes to bedroom affairs, I'm swearing off girls. Sorry girls.

In other news, dudes are still out too.

Pieces of You

An acquaintance of mine warned me about putting too much value in the people I know. Her intention was to tell me that I need to be my own person.

I disagree.

The people I know, the ones I call friends, are people of the highest quality, people I am honored to share my life with. Those people give me strength, and they affect my personality in all kinds of ways, even those people I only know for a short time.

For instance a girl I dated for only a few weeks, she says "I know" in the context of "You like to not smell like garbage? That's crazy talk", and then she says, "I know" with a huge smile and in an almost song like tone. Now every time I'm in that situation, or hear someone say those words in an incredulous sarcastic tone, I am reminded of how that part of her is still a part of me.

It's like when I go back to Lafayette and people say "Let's kick this pig" meaning "I'm ready to go". What most of them don't even realize is that the expression comes from a fencing time before they knew who Will Read was, let alone who originally was ready to kick pigs.

So you see, I'm an agglomeration of the people that are in or have passed through my life. I draw very little distinction between the people I know and have known, and the person I am - they're virtually synonymous.

Matt Asked

So here's the answer to his question, "What have you finally started to listen to?"

1. In high school and on and off the last ten years I have joked that I'm the "eternal bachelor". I say "joked" but it was always that kind of joking where there was more truth than you wanted to let on. I think it's time to resign to the fact that it just isn't going to happen. Life keeps yelling failure at me.


2. I have these moments where I feel like I'm having a cramp, but in my chest. Making a totally uninformed guess it probably is related to a high cholesterol level. This weekend while camping and feeling winded (but not muscle sore) while hiking up Cinder Cone I realized how much I need to take better care of my body. I don't eat very well either. Today a coworker pointed out how many calories I end up drinking  throughout the day in Coke. Life keeps yelling that I'm not doing a good enough job in the health department.


3. With the addition of a niece to my family I realize how distant I keep myself from my family. I look at pictures of her and it's easy to see how she is Jon's daughter. My cousin is going to be in town this weekend. A month back I saw another cousin who was south of the city. It's literally been years since I've seen them before now. Life keeps yelling at me to do better with my family ties.


4. I see the same thing in the pictures of the Roger's new daughter. Every baby I see reminds me of how I don't have a face to look at, someone who has my nose, my chin, my squinty eyes. Knowing my birth family is more important than I want to admit it is. Life keeps yelling at me that "nature" is also important.


5. I have a business idea. The hard kind of idea. The kind that means long hours, hard work, and a "shit-ton" of risk. The kind that tries to steal a person away from tending to his health, family, or romantic life. The kind that ought to be done, but is like carrying around a uranium rod - tremendous potential, but can also destroy all that it touches if one isn't careful.
   
   I've also served in a mentor/teacher/coach role in a lot of different ways. I am happier with life when I am in those roles. I feel like I am growing most during those times.

Conclusion:  My whole life is pretty unhealthy, not to mention my ongoing moral bankruptcy, and life is telling me.

Life has Been Shouting at Me

And I've only just begun to start listening again.

Annual Report

I think Matt pitched the idea of himself being a publicly held company, that his "stock", or value in life, went up and down based on the decisions he made and actions he took.

Along those same lines, I thought about the Board of Directors (BoD) for Will Read, Inc. Assuming I'm the CEO, who would I chair for his expertise in areas where I may want to grow? Who understands the core of Will Read's business and can help shape the future?

• Lara Owen - Head of energy and social things. She's also good at kicking my ass verbally when I'm being retarded.


• Matt Dickerson - At this point he has more historical knowledge of the company, and a cross section of it's product platform than most. Also a good source of balance and stability.


• Josh Williams - Because if Will Read, Inc. failed tomorrow, Josh Williams, Inc. would be there to step in and fill the gap.


• Davis Frank & Matt Magurany - They share a seat on the BoD because they both continue to show me that a) development can be done in a way that doesn't suck, and b) when the development chips are down, it is still possible to stay in it.


• Anne Radavich -They say that ever if there was a female version of me, it would be a lot like Anne. She is different from Josh in that she shares my traits, and not my mannerisms. Anne is full of surprises, like joining the Army, but like most everyone else on the BoD, has a very level head when approaching life's big challenges.

I feel like my brain could power down and that this team would make the same decisions that I would. There are some areas that are not represented, namely family and spirituality. I feel like there is a lot of room to grow there. Family in the 29th year for sure - there's no choice, the market demands it.

Setting up this analogy seems handy. It lets me identify where I'm investing my time, and it also seems to lend itself to establishing goals for the "fiscal year".

Cat Dudes

We were talking about Cat Ladies at work today, the ladies that have 57 cats and she loves them all and never has children because "the cats are her children", when someone mockingly said "you're being sexist". My brain, kinda mushy from the day anyway, decided to explore.

What it came up with was an observation that I don't know any single guys who have been living alone who owned a cat. None. Dudes just don't need cats. I have no reason to account for this, but an informal survey at the office quickly supported my observation.

Sure, single guys will take care of someone else's cat for extended periods of time. Guys might even verbally assert "I'm thinking about getting a cat, it'd be way easier than having a dog in my apartment." But I think at the end of the day you'd be hard pressed to find a guy who owns a cat of his own volition. Girls are crazy.

128 Slides of an Ideal Workplace

http://www.slideshare.net/reed2001/culture-1798664

This is how Netflix rolls, and largely it is also how Pivotal Labs conducts its business. I love my job.

You Can't Find Me in the Crowd

I've been part of several conversations lately that tell me people are afraid that "big brother" knows or will soon know more than they're comfortable with. One conversation was about the Patriot Act, I also was recently sent this link about what ordering pizza could be like. It basically shows a pizza girl clicking through the customer's health info, recent travel purchases, etc.,  and it is all meant to scare you so that you "Take Action" at the end.

But why shouldn't a pizza joint help me make good health decisions by upping the price when I order a pie? I still have the choice, it just is less attractive now to do the thing I wanted to do. Is it really so bad that this information is at someone's fingertips? If you live in a small community you already know what it can be like with everyone knowing what everyone else is up to. This isn't new. More importantly, why are you living life in a way that you have something to hide?

You argue back, "I don't have anything to hide, but what if I'm overlooked for a job because I have a heart condition, or because I spend a lot of money on pink flamingos?" To that I submit that you've probably been overlooked for things that weren't true about you. Wouldn't you rather people made decisions about you based on the truth?

Sure, if one person lets it all hang out while the rest of us keep it all in, he's going to be pretty vulnerable. But if we all lay it on the line for public examination, the guy who hides and holds back sticks out and draws attention. The more you make visible, the easier it is for people to trust you.

The spread of information isn't anything new, we see it in society old an new. You're already being judged, so why not give someone more than just a cover to go off of? Lastly, airing out your dirty laundry builds trust, so you have nothing to lose and so much to gain. Share your life, share it freely with anyone who will listen.

Found My Bluetooth Earpiece

It was in my fencing bag.

Now if only I could find my missing Wiimote I'd feel a lot less crazy.

My Phone Breaks Out

Because I was tired of my phone being super lame, I jailbroke it. So now I have the following things:

• Backgroundable apps - thank you!


• Bluetooth tethering, not that I really have a good use case for it


• GPS turn by turn directiony thingy


• Keyboard Cat ringtone/alarm  - sweet


• GV Mobile is back!

I still want AVRCP so my headphones can r0x0rz my b0x0rz.  I'm really tempted to shell out some bucks for the camera app that lets me tap anywhere to use the volume key which would be great of self portraits. I also can't wait to hook up a GPS logger to Google Latitude (is anyone a user btw?).